1 month already?!?

Ok.. so this comes as a definite shock to me that my relationship with blogger has completed a month !! (Soo made fr each otherr!!) Thank you readers for the encouragement and support!! My love for writing has increased immensely from the moment the reviews started coming in! So I decided, that my first month post should be dedicated to all of you.. Here's a collection of some of your comments along with the twisted backgroud chatter of my mind!

Brain chatter: BC

1. Haha what nonsense is that?
BC: Err its about you .. MOM! Thank you so much for your support!

2. So silly! You and your sarcastic comments!
BC: Umm.. thanks a ton dad.. Not!

3. I always knew you would be good at this..
BC: Aahh if I were a guy, I would so marry you!!

4. Your blog is turning out to be awesome!
BC: Oh the sweet sweet sound of compliments! Go on.. don't stop the flow..!

5. Its great! Engineering is a wrong field for you!
BC: Aww a cute boy compliment!! *punches in the air*

6. Oh my god! Its so boring.. I'm feeling sleepy Neha!
BC: Umm that boring? What amuses you then? Knock- Knock jokes or 8th standard humor? Amateur!

7. You have amazing talent! I hope later on, I can do the same thing.
BC: You are my favorite person! Starting from now!!

8. Its hard to impress an egoist like me.. good job!
BC: Thank you! (Why you no follow it then?)

9. Its really nice! I will follow your blog soon.
BC: Liar! Its been two weeks and I still have 13 followers!

10. Bob! You're turning too emo.. Write more of sarcastic stuff!
BC: You my friend are the only person who tells me this! Hail the great sarcasm!

11. Its good.. but the titles are too grunt!
BC: Umm.. grunt???

12. Hey your blogs are awesome! I keep a track of them.. they are great!
BC: Just two words baby! Follow and spread!!

Love and Other Drugs

“Sometimes the things you want the most don't happen and what you least expect happens. I don't know - you meet thousands of people and none of them really touch you. And then you meet one person and your life is changed forever.”

For starters, this post is not about the Anne Hathaway and Jake Gyllenhaal starring movie ‘Love and Other Drugs’! (although the above quote is taken from the movie) It is rather a comparison drawn between the hallucinatory drugs and another potent drug called ‘Love’.

Love! The heady rush one achieves during a new found love. That surreal joy, the unexplained exhilaration (crazy rising pulse!), the warm feeling that reaches to the very core, an escape from the banality of life, a pleasant mirage conceived by a thirsty heart, a clandestine affair so filled with thrill that you lose the ability of thinking clearly! Such striking similarities between the two truly amazes me.

However, everything in life comes with a price.. I ponder over this, midway at war with my paramour (currently, former.. sigh!) I come across, the inebriated state this feeling creates within us hapless beings, searching for companionship. Craving for more, this addiction blinds many a soul with a deceiving panache, the vulnerability attached with it seems as unnerving as the Russian roulette! Before you realise, you are already neck deep caught in a swirling ocean of helplessness created by none but you! It truly feels like a point of no return. Although, there are countless antidotes, I doubt any would heed to it.

P.S- I just realized that, this is my tenth post!! :) Thank you all readers for the support!! This post starts a new chapter in my life.. A new beginning, I welcome it with a smile! :)

That Sweet Bitch called Karma!:)

The above title may sound pretty offensive, but regardless of that, the people who linger at the receiving end of Karma's horrendous wrath would promptly agree to what I am talking about. Karma, as the definition goes by; is like an invisible force that carries the good and evil of a person. To sum it up in one sentence, its "What goes around comes around". That means that if a person does good, good fortune will come to him; likewise if the person commits evils, bad fortune will come to him. Its the basic concept which all religions revolve around. Although it defies pragmatism, it does form a comforting piece in the circle of life. Revenge maybe sweet, but Karma’s sweeter for those who cannot do much to settle scores. For many a good Samaritan  it is more like a deliberate shackle to stay put and be on their best behaviour. I pondered on this while watching my mother and sister offering namaz, this might hold true for the believers but what about the atheists and agnostics? Do they believe in this? Immediately the answer followed on its own.. ‘Every action has an equal and opposite reaction.’ Phew! Thanks to Newton, I can happily cross the non- believers off my checklist! Although it says opposite but there is a reaction nevertheless.. (who reads between the lines anyway!) Another intriguing situation crosses my mind wherein there are people who do not reap what they sow, where does Karma go at that time? The believers sought comfort in the concept of heaven and hell to make things even. The rest.. are probably left with an unanswered question, a void that may be filled by another scientist’s law, centuries later. Till then, I’m content yet cautious with that sweet sweet bitch called Karma!!

Lament of the Little Toe

I'm sure after reading the title you will probably have some serious doubts about the sanity of the writer..Yes! I have finally hit the wall and lost my brains.. My preternatural ability to bring things to life in my head, has crossed all barriers and hence I present to you the sad tale of the 'Little Toe!' So here it goes,

The other day my dear mother was going about her job of cleaning the house and flapping her wings around, throwing an occasional smart alec or two at me for not actively helping her in what she acknowledges as 'Home Making' (yeah right!) when suddenly during her unmindful scuttling she whammed her foot to the couch's leg! As she tossed and turned in extreme agony, I rushed to her rescue rolling my eyes at her sloppiness, and saw a rather appalling sight of her little toe badly bent in the opposite direction! I screamed in horror and prayed furiously that it shouldn't end up as a fracture. Thankfully it didn’t happen so.. My mother fearlessly caught the little devil and fixed it back in place! I was beginning to think that it was a fake toe bought off the internet.. (read 'My Angry bird Mom!')

So coming back to the tale of the little toe.. (sorry I got distracted!) As we sat there nursing her injury, my mother kept rambling curses at her toes, the little one in particular. She called it insignificant, a weakling, a klutz, err homeless! (that was in Urdu by the way, it actually sounds very harsh!) She asked me what was the purpose of that stupid appendage, to which I replied 'Actually nothing! Its a 'Vestigial' organ.. just like the appendix.' To which she looked up to the heavens and yelled 'Allah! Then why is it still there? take off all the toes or at least make them equally sized!!' By then I was beginning to feel sorry for that poor toe.. I shuddered at the weird image of having no toes or equally sized ones.. believe me it looked horrifyingly ugly! I went to my room to Google 'Significance of the little toe' (the joys of being utterly jobless!) and found that 'The little toe or baby toe helps in maintaining balance, although it is not as critical as the the other toes..' Ouch.. so it isn't very important. Wonder what it would be going through, if it had a mind of its own.. probably turn so depressed and suicidal.. it would need therapy! sigh.. no wonder it smashes itself repeatedly against the furniture! 

So I guess I should stop this story so filled with morose, while my brain impels to pen a befitting moral.. hmm.. I wonder.. Oh here it is.. Never be like the unfortunate little toe in life.. strive hard and become a thumb! Now that, will set you apart from all the other mammals and make you substantial!! 

A Chat with Death of the 21st Century

The sound of quick footsteps filled the hallway of an empty house. A slim and tall faceless figure approached the bedroom. Dressed in a crisp black suit and a bowler hat, Death slowly entered the room searching for his victim.. a lifeless heap lay in front of him, face down on the table, his glasses askew. Death impatiently glanced at his watch which started beeping indicating his next assignment. Rapping furiously on what looked like a high end version of a tablet, he waited for his victim to come to senses. ‘Mr Guy (yes I'm unable to come up with a name!) I’m afraid your time is up.. I’m here to escort you to afterlife’ said Death after a while. Mr Guy’s soul woke up in shock.. there lay his dead self beside him and as he scanned the table to find out what must have killed him.. an unfinished Chinese take out, extra large fries, a gaming console and some random stuff.. He still pondered upon his demise. ‘How did this happen to me?’ asked Guy with a downcast glance at the eerie figure before him. Death tried to regain his composure, same old question! he thought, the incessant beeping from his watch breaking the awkward silence. ‘Mr. Guy, did you know that you had cancer?’ asked Death. ‘What? No! Cancer killed me?’ exclaimed Guy. ‘Well, not exactly .. you are lucky that heart attack got you first. It is less painful of the two’ said Death nonchalantly. The blaring continued from the watch, 'Its time to leave Mr. Guy, you can bid good bye to your gadgets and junk food as they were your only true friends, your parents will mourn your loss and you may meet them after a decade or two in afterlife, as they were the last of healthy generation left. Now Mr. Guy if you can please hurry, I have a very busy schedule ahead of me!’ said Death rapping swiftly on his ‘Death Pad’. Guy wretched by all the commotion, shuffled his feet and timorously asked ‘Umm.. Mr. Death, all of this is fine.. but may I ask one last question?’. Death looked at the hapless being and agreed to him, ignoring the sound from his watch. ‘Hmm.. since I am going to stay up there for a long while, umm.. like eternity and all.. Will there be online shopping service? Otherwise I don’t really know what to do, I am bound to get bored!’ whined Mr. Guy in a timid voice. Death taken aback by the strange request, pitying for the disdainful state of mankind and their disregard for life, answered with melancholy in his voice ‘Hmm.. we shall see about that, now shall we get going Mr. Guy? Death rarely waits for anyone..’

  

A Bus ride through Bangalore on a Sunday morning

Alright.. Before you go through the title and mentally label this as an impossible feat to achieve! I would like to add that I had an identical opinion about this, only to be dumbstruck with joy a while later. So here it goes..

It was about a week ago, I was supposed to give an entrance exam on a Sunday (sigh) and my exam centre was located in the other corner of the city (oh yeah, I’m always lucky with that!) So yeah, my mother woke me up early in the morning and for the next half hour I whined about my life, the heavens and the examination board. As I continued to mutter curses under my breath, I was booted out of my house and into the bus about an hour early! (my mom has an uncanny knack of dealing with wimpy kids like me!)

As the bus began to move, I noticed there were hardly any people and the bus looked exceptionally clean, another bizarre thing I saw was, a happy bus conductor (we Bangaloreans regard it as a myth!) as I observed he continued to hum a popular Kannada track and went about his job, chatting occasionally with people and helping them with directions. As expected on an early morning during weekends, the roads were traffic free and our bus eased through effortlessly. The cold wind rushed through my face and by now I was thoroughly enjoying the calm and blissful atmosphere around me. I looked outside my window, to see a deserted but a lovely Bangalore, no shops except the petty ones and the street vendors were open, the malls looked like they never existed.. There were a few people here and there probably out to savour the morning beauty. The best part was that, my city looked greener than ever, the sunlight painting the surroundings in shades of gold and yellow. As I sat there transfixed listening to myriads of sounds of the nature with a slight intervention of hustle and bustle of the city, piecing together in a perfect symphony. I wondered that this might have been the Bangalore as it was, two decades ago.. in all its alluring glory.

Soon the bus halted and I was shaken out of my reverie and took one last glimpse out the window (of the bus and my thoughts) I realized that I have an exam waiting to torment me, but somehow I was at peace and oblivious to that, my mind captivated by what I call the ‘The Bloom of Dawn’.

Photography credits: Naazneen Ahmed

Never Too Old For Cartoons!

It happened about 6 years ago, on a  dull summer night, I sneaked out of my bedroom.. It was way past my bed time (10:45  pm) my movements were almost torpid.. Damn! This addiction has got to stop! I thought to myself as I descended the stairs, switched on the TV and immediately put it to mute to avoid any attention.. I quickly flickered through the channels; my mind wandering off  to sleep already.. until I finally got to what I was looking for, about 20 blissful minutes, I relished the previously missed episode of 'Avatar : The last Airbender' on Nikelodeon. This is too good to be true! I said happily to myself.. but alas! like all the good things in life.. this too came to an end.. my dear angry bird mom rushed down stairs.. and well.. the following events are sort of blurred in my memory.. there was definitely a scary tirade (included lots of wing flapping and pecking) as it turned out I had my 10^th preparatory exams the next day (who studies for preparatory exams anyways?!) I vaguely remember her yelling 'Aren't you too old for these silly cartoons!!?' and that, got me thinking...
Six years later, when I was downloading an episode of 'Phineas and Ferb' my mother asked me the very same question.. with a hint of sympathy in her voice (probably thinking I'll be alone for the rest of my life!) .. and I turned to her and confidently said 'No mom, cartoons are not just meant for kids, they have an amazing story line and they remind me of the finer nuances that make up a happy childhood. The innocent joy we derive from it,  is priceless! So mom, I doubt I would ever get too old for cartoons!' To that heartfelt assertion of mine.. well she slept through it I guess, she simply walked away. As I sat there beaming at my words, I wondered what would be my opinion about cartoons, say a decade from now.. I definitely reckon it would be the same!

Betrayal

Ok so a little deviation from the usual retard randomness of mine. This was my first proper attempt at poetry.. (well other than my funny rendition of Roses are red, violets are blue..!) so here it goes..


There was a time when I sat alone,
  idle was my mind;
 My innocent eyes wondering,
  what laid ahead in time.
And out of the blue came Betrayal!
  disguised as a noble suitor,
Wooed my heart with a cruel skill,
  and promised a bright future.
Each day my heart soared to new heights,
  and little did I know;
That this was all a blissful illusion,
  One day it all might go..
And that fateful day did come,
  when truth had paved its way,
The mask was off, I faced Betrayal;
  with no more words to say!
The fog of confusion cleared,
  revealing deeper uncertainity.
A storm of rage then came,
  numbing away the brutal pain!
And as the waves of fury lashed across,
  poor Betrayal stood in vain.
Finally the storm had calmed,
  a bruised heart on its way to heal;
Ghosts of past don't haunt me anymore,
  the betrayal now... unreal!
And now there lies deep within me,
 an unforgiven memory.
As I wait with hardened eyes;
 to see what lies in my destiny.